The traditional family roles seem like a goal compared to the dysfunction and untraditional roles I grew up in my household. My mom was a housewife being that she did not work outside of the house. She did not clean the home or cook regularly and we as kids took care of her as she suffered from schizophrenia. My father was about thirty years older than her so he valued traditional roles so much that he married my mother after seeing her at his cousin’s restaurant alone with a small child on her own. He said to himself that child needs a father and he needs a woman at home to take care of the house. He had no idea she was sick but as he learned about the tornado she would become. He just learned how to deal with it. He only knew how to keep the family together and always go to work to provide for us. He was so old fashioned that he even gave her his paychecks, she never paid the bills just bought junk food that she would then string up to hang over the ceilings. Perhaps traditional roles come from a scale of how to do family properly and mine was an example of what not to do.
Especially traditional roles as a mother I’ll admit having the traditional roles as an example help me define my own in relationships. I’ve been a wife, mother but a female all my like if I continue comparing my life to traditional contradictory standards it’ll drive me crazy and keep me stuck playing the blame game.
Going from being a housewife to a single mother I snapped under the pressures of not being perfect and now no longer have my paternal rights. Going from a good mother to a “bad” one according to society but I am a mother who is fighting for her rights back. And thriving there is no category for the women that reemerge into society oppression happy. I am untraditionally creating my own standards of living regardless of society see’s me.
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